Since the scaffolding went up outside my balcony,
I’ve wondered if a thief may come in the night.
I don’t think the clear plastic sealing me in
will deter a determined expropriator.
The stereo is old, and the TV too heavy to steal.
In fact, the TV cost me less than TV tax these days.
A tax on TV? Only socialist wonks can enforce funding
for smug amateurs churning out reckless propaganda.
Give me a good drive any day,
and I’ll pledge pearls to cast before swine.
A woman without a man is not like a fish without a bicycle.
If everyone in Stockholm got around by bike,
the roads would look like they do in China.
I don’t care if I look like Donald Duck,
I like to put my feet on the ground when I’m sitting in the saddle.
Rickshaws aren’t bad for the driver,
but they’re like peppermint chocolate chip ice cream for me.
I won’t puke. I promise.